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Danielle

[ website | poo...::shakes head disapprovingly:: ]
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

(1 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

hmm. [21 Jun 2008|03:14pm]
[ music | "Waking Up In Vegas" by Katy Perry ]

ok,so my grandma left me a strange voicemail... umm, when i moved out, i never told her where we moved, god forbid she tries to show up and irritate me some more. so this voicemail went like this:

::gargle gargle::
::static::
Danielle...??
I hope you listening to this message.
You took all of my black thread.
I only have one and I need to using the machine and I have to switch them.
::more static::
If you bring them back, we can share. I'll share it with you.
::gargle gargle::
::some other crap::
click.

it went something like that, and I'm not even exaggerating. this woman doesn't even talk to me, but she just had to call me to tell me i took all her black thread (huh? no.) and that i HAVE to bring it back and we'll...share...the thread.




confusion.

(make your judgments, you judger!)

stupid crack-like "Chosen"...go to hell with your cack-i-ness (but not b4 the next one comes out) [22 May 2008|01:11am]
holyshitjesusfuckingchristwhatthehellnowmyheadhurtsicantbelieveitwhatthefuckthenextonebettercomeoutrightfuckingnowsoicanreaditimmediatelyholyFUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!




FUCK!!!!!



AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

(make your judgments, you judger!)

um. [03 May 2008|03:17am]
[ mood | tired and sick ]
[ music | my air filter ]

huh?



in a Kohl's parking lot...



and i now absolutely LOVE dominos for the mere fact that they confuse me.



(2 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

art 129 [28 Apr 2008|06:18pm]
[ mood | can't decide ]

just some photos i've taken from my digital photo class. 



more to come.

(3 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

i just saw the new harry potter movie.. [12 Jul 2007|11:05pm]
...

and i'm officially disappointed.

i should know by now that no one can do the books justice...





i'm going to go kill myself so that i'm not disappointed for the rest of my life...

well, maybe i'll wait until the last book comes out...maybe.

(2 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

a bit of a change...bear with me [19 Feb 2007|02:08am]
[ mood | pensive, a good word to feel ]
[ music | "hurt" by thousand foot krutch ]

i kno it's been a while...wutev, i feel random...

i don't know if you kno Nancy, but she's awesome. she one of my best friends, mainly because we're equally weird (sometimes she much more weird than i am tho.

if you happened to be unfortunate enough to hang out with us together one day, you will realize that a 'danielle and nancy inside joke talk' to english dictionary is completely necessary (poor stefan and cocoa)

nancy: who makes our top 10 weird people list?
danielle: well, there's creepy leg man... uhh, so-you-have-a-phone guy, get in the van! guy...blaine's super stalker, he's a real freak...
nancy: yea, that fucker sucks!
danielle: hmm...who else is there? after all of our time at rcc, how are we drawing blanks on this??!?
...
...
...
TOM-JOE! that bastard is DEFINITELY high on the list!
nancy: definitely!
...
...
oh! T1000!
danielle: oh my god, i can't believe i forgot T1000!! that fucker is #1 on the fuckin weird freaky people list!
nancy: most definitely!


now, i can understand how strange this conversation would seem odd to a passerby. that is why i feel compelled to give descriptions of the previously stated freaks.

creepy-leg man: this guy started out normal enough, then he started to wave his freak flag right in nancy's face, by sitting next to her w/his arm around her and going for her leg (which she had to matrix away from him - she's got skills), then he actually caressed - yes he did, and no, i never use that word - her hand. thus creepy leg man was born.

so-you-have-a-phone guy: another one of blaine's stalkers (there are many). his way of getting girls is to randomly walk up to girls out of no where and ask them, "So, you have a phone?" plus he hold the worst conversation, he says, umm and like a lot, and speaks way too slowly...that fucker.

get in the van! guy: blaine stalker #1. she was at the nanuet mall, and just when all hope of getting home at a decent hour was slipping away an acquaintance came by and kept her company. they went for a walk, which turned into a stroll on a used car lot, where the assailant got into a large truck (like the kind you abduct ppl in), pulled down his pants, and exclaimed, "Get in the van!" ... we laugh about it to this day.

blaine's super stalker: now this is a sad excuse for a human being.  no one really lies him, at all. if you even make the mistake of saying hi to him, he thinks you're his best friend for life, even if you never acknowledge his existence ever again.  he became blaine's super stalker after she accepted a ride home from him from rcc one night.  since then, he fuckin pops out from nowhere buggin the shit outta everyone! and he always *touches* blaine in some way, whether it be a squeeze of her shoulder, or putting his freezing cold hand on her face like a true fucker...he's really weird.  and he can never leave without a hug from her...awww, that freaky FUCK!!

tom-joe: now this one is weird. nancy and i met him on bus 95 - Haverstraw to RCC (public transportation in rockland is full of freaks).
first, he doesn't know that purple haze is by jimmy hendrix - not pink floyd. also, he told nancy his name was tom, then asked her to read his book, whose author was named joe (hence: tom-joe)
next (or second, for those paying attention), he sleeps in strange positions on the bus - picture how you would bend your arms to signify a dog begging with it's head cocked to the side.
third, he randomly stares at me and flails his arms about
...
thank you rockland tor...

and finally

T1000: this kid is a transfer student from Korea, i think, and i can't remember his name, ppl mihgh have called him david, but that doesn't matter.  i first met him through my friend jaime (guy).  T1000 was stalking jaime, and really obviously, he followed him around like a dog, barely saying a word.
and YES, despite popular belief, that fucker speaks perfect english! one day in the cafeteria he asked to see the sports section of the USA Today sitting on the table...
ANYWAY, i digress...
one day, while sitting in the sleepy room at rcc (which is mostly windows), nancy and i saw jaime walking across the main courtyard, closely followed by the culrpit, who was running after him.  we soon realized that he ran EXACTLY like T1000 from Terminator 2, and so that was his name, from now and for all eternity...

i like this entry, despite its length...i think i might do the rest of my entries in this matter, since all the shit nancy and i go through is unbelievable odd and hilarious...

more to come when i remember to do it again.

\m/

(5 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

i'm in sociology...confused [06 Dec 2006|02:53pm]
[ music | irritating sociology professor/ retarded girl ]

theres this girl in my sociology class (i'm lookin at her now)...she confuses me. she has a new york/english/retarded "accent" that i just don't fucking get. it makes me want to stab her in the face...a lot. she's also one of those stick-your-hand-up-in-class-to-say-random-useless-shit kind of people that makes the class last a lot longer than it should. i want to push her out of the window, right now.




later \m/

(1 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

what ?!?!? it's snowing outside?!?!?! [04 Dec 2006|02:40pm]
what the fuck is this cold shit going on outside...snow is pretty and all, but i hate the winter. i hate being cold and dressing in layers and running from building to building outside and my face being cold. it fucking sucks.

oh, and sociology sucks cause my professor is a freak who needs some strong medication...

yea.

(make your judgments, you judger!)

[04 Dec 2006|02:39pm]
what the fuck is this cold shit going on outside...snow is pretty and all, but i hate the winter. i hate being cold and dressing in layers and running from building to building outside and my face being cold. it fucking sucks.

oh, and sociology sucks cause my professor is a freak who needs some strong medication...

yea.

(5 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

[16 Oct 2006|05:46pm]
my grandma
is a
FUCKING WHOREBAG!!!</>

(2 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

u'll be completely shocked [17 Jul 2006|04:49pm]
get this...i can actually take time out and see my mom for more than one day, hang with brit and some other ppl, and hopefully see meg and cait this week. i love not having to work, it's amazing...

i can actually have a life


i kno, even i'm still stunned

(5 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

ok...gaylord! [15 Apr 2006|07:16pm]
[ mood | stupid allergies and headache ]
[ music | "Angel Pumping Gas" by The Postal Service ]

some really sucky news...turns out i can't go to Six Flags, even after i paid...admission to the park, as much eat as i want, riding the Kingda-Ka, and having sum awesome fun with my friends, all gone...i'm depressed...




on a lighter note: i so wanna steal all these... and these too




i gotta get me a CT2004 myself...

(5 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

dont feel good... [03 Apr 2006|10:37pm]
i hate bad weather

i can feel it in my head, n i feel sick 2



::falls off of computer chair and dies::

(12 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

hmmm... [13 Mar 2006|07:20pm]
who is
this



PLEASE!!! TELL MEE!!!

(1 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

as usual [05 Mar 2006|04:49pm]
[ mood | tired ]
[ music | project runway - the almost season finale ]

i am so completely tired... i wanna just sleep for like 2 weeks straight. i just wanna be accepted to the college i love, and leave right away. i think i'm going to go cry now...from exhaustion. bye.

(2 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

hell yes [29 Jan 2006|07:51pm]
fuckin amazing…
Top Ten Chuck Norris Facts

1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. '''Ever'''.

2. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

3. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

4. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

5. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.

6. Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.

7. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies
the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

8. Chuck Norris' blood type is AK+. Ass-Kicking Positive. It is compatible only with heavy construction equipment, tanks, and fighter jets.

9. Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian.

10. In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.

11. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.


Additional Chuck Norris Facts

* Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

* Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down.

* Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

* The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.

* Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.

* Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72… and they're all poisonous.

* If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, “Two seconds 'til.” After you ask, “Two seconds 'til what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

* Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

* When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

* The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.

* Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.

* CNN was originally created as the “Chuck Norris Network” to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.

* Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

* There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

* Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

* What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris' victims
before they died? His shoe.

* Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

* Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45–11…. a suicide.

* Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.

* Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.

* A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

* Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia.

* Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.

* If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

* Chuck Norris originally appeared in the “Street Fighter II” video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this “glitch,” Norris replied, “That's no glitch.”

* Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will fuck you up.

* The opening scene of the movie “Saving Private Ryan” is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.

* Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, “Bang!”

* Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.

* Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

* Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

* Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

* Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.

* Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse… horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

* Faster than a speeding bullet … more powerful than a locomotive … able to leap tall buildings in a single bound… yes, these are some of Chuck Norris's warm-up exercises.

* Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle — you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.

* In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

* Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell “What The Fuck was That?”

* Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.

* Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.

* Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.

* The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn.

* In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

* According to the Encyclopedia Brittanica, the Native American “Trail of Tears” has been redefined as anywhere that Chuck Norris walks.

(3 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

i like optimum... [24 Jan 2006|04:37pm]
the optimum guy that came to my house to fix our HBO on Demand was really hott...

(7 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

jesus [19 Jan 2006|02:50pm]
[ mood | fuckin freezing, and mad! ]
[ music | Dane Cook, that silly bastard, "Super Bleeder" ]

i can't fucking believe this shit. these people deserve to get their balls chewed off by a tiger, beaten to a pulp, then killed in a horrific manner, only to be resuscitated and have it all happen again. they all need to die! fuckin bastards!








hit me back to tell me how much u hate these ppl
\m/

(10 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

wow [12 Jan 2006|04:24pm]
I've got some
awesome friends... )

(6 added/make your judgments, you judger!)

uh huh [19 Dec 2005|05:30pm]
[ mood | drugged...i think ]
[ music | hhdgyusssd ]

lala so b o r e d. have to do claculus, then eat sugar. peanuts.... ::smells food:: mmm grilled chicken and POTATOES!! sleep now...

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